This past weekend, I went to visit my family for my birthday and for Mother's day (I'll post more on that later). It was a great weekend, but the only thing that became quite hilarious was people's apparent desire to consider me a 50 year old (not that there is anything wrong with being a 50 year old).
Take instance #1:
On Friday night, we went to a baseball game. While we were sitting there, these three, girls came and sat in front of us. Their skin was the color of oompa loompas and their shorts barely covered their arses's, and they all had the same hair color. In any case, they came to sit by the guys who were previously sitting in front of us. They began taking an array of photos of, well, everything. But mostly themselves. So, after watching this go on for about 30 minutes, I asked if they would like for me to take their pic for them. To which they responded excitedly, yes! I took their camera and took a group photo of them. When I was finished, I handed the camera back to the lead girl and she responded with "Thank you, Ma'am".... When did I become a "Ma'am"? It was as if the world stopped, my dad laughed, patted me on the back, and said, you don't look like a "Ma'am". I said thank you, but he is of course, a little baised. I looked down at my clothes, to make sure I wasn't wearing mom jeans or that I didn't have some other type of clothing that made me look like a "ma'am". Sure enough, I was all clear in my tank top and shorts. But apparently, looking mature, not orange, and wearing shorts that don't show my arse, makes me a "ma'am", who knew.
On Sunday, we went to brunch for Mother's day. Afterwards, my mom and I went to CVS to get some "necessities" (which by the way, when my mom and I go to CVS we always ending up buying everything but necessities). I walk up to the check out counter, happily hand over my CVS rewards card (which I am glad I could find because nothing is worse then being asked for your rewards card and embarrisingly having to say "I do have one, I just don't have it with me"). The check out lady scans my purchases, I pay, and then as I am about to walk away, I hear "Have a very happy mother's day, ma'am."....awkward pause..."Uh...thank you?" Apparently, the CVS woman thought that not only was I a "ma'am" but that I also MUST have had children already.. Silly me. I appreciated the nice message from the check out lady, but "Hey, have a good day" might have done more for the ole self confidence.
In any case, after this weekend, I'm taking a closer assessment of my appearance, just to make sure its clear that no, I am not a "ma'am"..yet, and hey its okay that I don't have children.